I was totally against family planning because of the fear of infertility but I followed my friends to a place where they used one kit for all of us.
I was 12 years old when I had my first sexual experience. It was consensual. The man had always been nice to me, and we made out severally before the sex happened.
As the firstborn of a single mom selling Paraga (alcoholic drinks) by the roadside with three siblings, I was saddled with the responsibility of helping out. Our peak periods are early in the morning and late at night. Initially, I was going to school after the early hour rush subsided, but I later dropped out of school along the way. Time passed before I realized, but it was too late.
It is easy to get few bucks from our customers because when they are under the influence of alcohol, they can do anything. The money I was making alongside my mother’s business was what we were living on.
I delivered my first baby and everything turned upside down because the man I told was responsible for the pregnancy declined – his reason being that he saw me with other men. He was not the only one I had sex with. Truly he was not the only one but I was very sure he was responsible for the pregnancy, not totally, so I could not argue.
My mother took care of me while pregnant and the baby afterwards; it was the hardest part of my life.
Immediately after delivery, I was strong enough to start helping out and business resumed as usual as we lived mostly on the street. Before I knew it, I got pregnant again and this time I could not tell my mother because my baby was barely five months old and I was not even ready to go through the stress all over again.
So I ran to my friends.
After making jest of me, they eventually told me how to go about it and I agreed to see their ‘doctor’ for abortion.
There were two other people and we all went through the procedure one after the other.
I felt so free.
About three months after the abortion, I noticed weakness, loss of appetite and I was constantly feeling sick.
“This cannot be pregnancy again,” I told myself, especially since I’ve been using protection during sex. So I bought some over-the-counter malaria medications a couple of times hoping to get better until I decided to go for pregnancy test which came out negative yet the sickness worsened.
I noticed watery stool which was persistent. I returned to the hospital and they ran more tests including HIV screening which came out positive.
The news was a shock and for a week I could not tell my mother despite pestering me to know why I was depressed. I kept asking myself ‘how come’?
I had to make a list of those I had sex with to know who or where the virus came from which took me a while because anytime I thought of it, I didn’t feel I was up to the task.
Two weeks after my hospital visit, I was sitting quietly in my mother’s corner where we sell drinks when one of my friends came and told me one of those ladies we went to do the abortion together was admitted in the hospital for chronic diarrhea. I was shocked but I could not tell her what I’ve been passing through until she broke into tears and told me she did HIV screening and she was positive.
It was as if lightening struck my head. See what I got myself into.
